I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
