Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
