i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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