my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
