who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
