We won't sleep together?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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