OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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