did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
