he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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