im gay
i know
yea but for you.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
