i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
