I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
