i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
