Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
