CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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