remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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