Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.