My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
It was like giving head to a cactus.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize