Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Randomize
