Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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