:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You have to summon your inner elephant
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
