i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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