when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize