He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Randomize
