you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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