he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
