In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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