Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
