you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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