the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
