next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
It was confusing and full of hummus
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
