Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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