just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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