if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
