you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize