Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
