Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
