Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
