did you get engaged???
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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