Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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