I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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