discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
