no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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