and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
