i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
