If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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