Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
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