4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
