My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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