zippers are such a cool invention
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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