While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
