Yo dont text me then not text me
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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