You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
