I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize